Anger

What is your problem? Obviously you have one. Hurting someone completely innocent, and making them cry, not only in anger but in pain that you have created. She had always spent that extra on you and you act like a three year old who hasn't had a nap. Why? What is it that has you so vindictive towards my mother? It's unfair if you ask me, I'm pretty sure no one deserves something like that. So why do you do you take advantage of this situation to tell her something like this? Now, I'm pretty sure that someone approaching the age of twenty-one at a rather fast rate should not treat something about their sick uncle as something that is all about them. I'm almost positive that any one else would be worried more about their uncle who only has 19% of their heart working, then about getting back at the God Mother for something that she never did, I'm sorry I feel this way but any bitch that hurts my mom hurts me. One more thing if you're a fucking lady then I'm pretty that makes me a goddamn princess. So Thank You.


Ok now if you're reading this and wondering WTF?? Extended family are totally stupid if you ask me, maybe I'll post why I wrote this, but this right here is a rant, when i'm completely fed up with something and decide to finally post it because it is bugging me that much. usually this writing sort of stuff gets me happy and over stupid stuff. So thanks:)

SQ:)

Tap Tap Tap

The sound of the keys being pushed and the dance of the fingers as they tap across the keyboard as though they are dancing with one another, each in a different place at a different time, each moving to creat a tap that's as steady as feet dancing and the heels of the shoe tapping across the floor. Quickly the dance speed increase when an idea is hit and the fingers move quickly across the keyboard tapping here and there and where ever they belong, then hitting the backspace to correct a recent mistake then they return to the alphabet that is scattered around the board.



Hmmm I wrote this in computar class can you tell what every one was doing or what??

Hmmm

My chest heaves up and down, trying to catch my breath. I'm afraid it's going to happen again, where I can't breathe and it feels like my lungs are being crushed and compacted into a tight bundle. If I just keep it in, I won't have to suffer the pain of my lungs again, so I try. The urge to cough comes and I press on past the pain, until my throat begins to tickle and my whole chest rattles from my breathing. Even if I wanted it I could never be quiet. There is no peace here, I try to gain my composure, and to gain myself, but it's as if this sickness has enveloped my whole body changing me from the person who brings a smile to every ones face to the one who is in the corner turning a shade paler with each passing moment.

There comes a time when I must swallow the thick syrup that just might help all this, maybe it will make it better? So with just the thought that it will end all the unfair and no longer peaceful parts of my life, give me the calming feeling that my life has been craving for so long. So as I do so, it gathers in the back of my throat, coating my whole mouth with fowl taste, and staying in the back of my throat unable to be swallowed, because I am unsure if it is right that I am to rid myself of this constant feeling of craze.


How was that? I used my sister as inspiration, we are both suffering a major cold. So I thought it made a good line. :P

Something New

I am an exciting person,well I like to think that and I will until I get tired of it and start acting differently.

Well sorry, I have been... I don't know where really. I've been everywhere and anywhere! :P Buuut that's ok. I don't feel like writing something deep today. I feel like being giddy and happy. O.o lol well I'll get something soon. Let me rest. haha Well lately I've had so much homework, it's like nasty! O.O Stuuupid PHYSICS! Oh well let me have a week... Eeek! it's almost finals!!

Alright, well I have a paper to write about gum in hair. Woohoo... this sucks. Oh well thanks for listening! :)

SamQ

A Home Away From Home

Call me what you want, but I'm not going home. I don't wanna go home something there just is'nt right something is wrong in everywhich way I look at it. I will stay here until I feel home will be a good place. A good place for me to stay. Not far of course, not alone as well a place where people flow in and out, at a constant rate except for me. I leave to class, and return to watch the people pass and go to another place and still I am sure that they will return they always do. Unless something wrong and terrible has happened and caused a riot. An uproar, in this calm and peaceful place.

That place that I call home seems so distant. As though it is a million miles away and to return I must walk. A walk that would tear the soles of my feet causing unwanted blisters and pain. Such a painful way to go. Why won't the people who love me deep within their hearts come to take me from this place, take me so I won't go to a place that I feared, but take me to a place that was warm, and inviteing. Not filled with the constant screams and cries from children. Why must things be so hard to live with in such conditions. Will I be able to stand all the: pain, fighting, anger?

Shall I return to that place I call home only to be sent back to where I came? I have no choice. For still it is my home.

Voices in my head

Screaming in my ears

A lot of the time I think that it's just a dumb song stuck in my head, because of the loud screaming music that I do in fact listen to. Yet this is not a mesh of voices screaming at me it is one single voice yelling and franticly thrashing about in my head. Somehow it doesn’t burst out and create a mess around the world. Somehow it stays combined into my head screaming yelling until I crawl into the fetal position and turn into a ball of fury trying to silence that single scream. What is going to happen when I understand what that voice is saying? Will I allow it to keep up the rising volume or will I just stop living all together. Will I stop and just sob until I fall into a pitch black dream of silence or will I just do nothing and go along as though nothing major has ever occurred and I am fine all out fine? That constant sound rings almost as though it were a tune dancing in my ear teasing and scratching at the making sense or not.

You see, if only I could show you how this ringing of constant screams, maybe this might make sense, but as of right now nothing seems to come to mind on how to show you.

I know I haven't been on in what seems like forever. But um now that schools out I have all of summer to do my thinking and writing projects or whatever anyway i hope you liked it but if not I don't care!!!!!!! you don't faze me :P

D-o-A

To Cry Alone

All by myself. Really that's the only way for me to be able to cry, all alone. Most of the time I sit upon the pink and black bedspread of mine and use my hands as a personal face shield. The shield keeps away the world of both hurt and reality. They hide me from what I fear. Most of the time I don't fear yet there is that time that I feel is a silent creeper on my life taking away my pleasant disposition and replacing it with an angry, sad and miserable young person.

How? A common asked question by both me and many others. I don't know. Eyes creeping their way across a room to spot me with tears dripping out of my eyes, in soft silent sobs. It's something that causes me stress that is unfair. I to love to know what am happening around me and yet I don't feel that it's okay to cry with my whole heart in front of people. Yes I do let tears fall, but alone is where they resign in comfort.

Am I making any such since to you? I hope I am yet some are not sure of what I mean. Most of the time they are not sure and I hope that if reading this you might just maybe understand.

So how was that my readers hopefully both new and old? Tell the truth I'm a big girl.